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By Geiska Velasquez
Most people are stressed out by their jobs today, even to the point of burnout. There are many common frustrations such as the micromanager, the annoying coworker, the unfairness of the workplace, the little to no benefits, the lack of promotion
or raises, and etc. There is plenty in the modern workplace that causes us stress and frustration, namely the persistent perception that there is always more to do than there is time to do it.
But, there is also one unnecessary, preventable, stresser pervading the workforce today. There has become a common unspoken understanding today that our work defines our worth.
I don’t mean our “worth” as in our net worth or how much we are paid for the work we do. I am absolutely all for being paid what your work is worth!
Where we are getting confused is that we have become to believe that our work determines our worth as a human being.
“Your work does not determine your worth!”
Your value as a human being has nothing to do with the work that you do in the world. Every one of us is as valuable as the next. I have often thought of human beings like tiny statues of gold. We may be many different shapes, but we all have the same mass, therefore those little golden lumps are all worth the same.
This philosophy, that our worth is determined by our work, is creating serious problems for ourselves, and the businesses we work for.
In our daily lives believing in this concept is causing us more stress, and contributes to burnout, on top of an already stressful life. Since it is impossible to find your worth in your work we are constantly striving for something that can never be accomplished. We are looking for the response that indicates our worth that will never come.
Thousands of people are also walking around needlessly single because they are waiting for the day when their work deems them worthy enough and therefore ready to meet their mate. Loneliness is a major contributor, not only to burnout, but to depression and other unhealthy things.
Not only are we desperately striving for acknowledgment of our worth as human beings in our work and postponing relationship until we have received such notes of worthiness, but we are also destroying the businesses we work for with this mentality. It is becoming increasingly more difficult to be an effective manager, supervisor, or business owner.
Naturally, human beings are validated in their tribes. Our parents, relatives, and best friends validate us as we grow and mature and help us develop our sense of self-worth. Aside from this, humans develop a sense of self-worth through their religious training, upbringing, and experiences.
Unfortunately, those of us going to work looking for our work to validate our worth are making our managers, supervisors, and workplaces our parental replacement, friend replacement, family replacement, and even a replacement for God. As our bosses are not, and can never be, God this is a recipe for disaster.
Not only do we, as workers, place upon ourselves unrealistic expectations of our work defining our worth, but we have now placed unrealistic, unattainable, expectations on those that lead and manage us. Therefore we can never be satisfied with their leadership of us.
Say it with me now,
“my work does not define my worth“
and now let’s add
“because my worth is inherent in my humanness“
and furthermore
“and I resign from the quest to prove my worth at work.“
You are already worthy. You are already valuable. You are already attractive. You are already desirable. You are already wonderful. You already have everything you need for validation.
Take that weight off of your shoulder. Acknowledge yourself for the worthy, valuable human being that you are.
Strive to validate yourself and to refrain from thinking of your workplace as the court and jury for your worth and you will begin to find less stress and more joy immediately.
If you’re having trouble getting these things straight, give us a call, and will help you see your precious self for what it is.
© 2019 LifeWork Harmony & Geiska Velasquez